At our breakfast table, orange juice is discussed in quantities that would make your grocer sit down. We understand you prefer yours without pulp. We prefer ours with a controlling position.
The agricultural markets reward attention, access, and a certain ability to remain seated while other people become agitated. All three are longstanding family advantages. Our chairs, incidentally, are exceptional.
Frozen concentrated orange juice has attracted some regrettable attention to our firm. We consider the crop report a matter for the partners, and the ensuing curiosity a matter of poor breeding. Breakfast will proceed without questions.
We understand you prefer yours without pulp. We prefer ours with a controlling position.
Some observers insist that markets cannot be persuaded by a distinguished surname. We regard this as an unfortunate lapse in market etiquette, and have asked that it be looked into.
Further questions may be directed to your grocer. We understand he is quite approachable.
The Agricultural Desk. Further comment declined.
A parody editorial. The partners’ certainty should not be mistaken for financial advice.