To those considering an introduction,
We should first clarify that being received in our reception room is not the same as being received. The room exists largely to preserve that distinction. Please admire the portraits while you wait.
We occasionally disagree about the source of human excellence. Randolph attributes it to circumstance. Mortimer prefers breeding. Neither has found it necessary to consult anyone who might complicate the discussion.
The prospect of being right, particularly at one’s brother’s expense, remains beyond valuation.
Such matters are settled in the traditional manner: a private wager, a perfectly serviceable theory, and a degree of confidence ordinarily reserved for people who have never been told to leave.
The stake is one dollar. The sum is modest because the money is irrelevant. The prospect of being right, particularly at one’s brother’s expense, remains beyond valuation.
Should you wish to offer an opinion, kindly remember that we already have two. It is an embarrassment of riches.
Randolph & Mortimer Duke. The order is under discussion.
An invented letter inspired by the brothers’ wager in Trading Places. Even Hollywood did not supply this correspondence.